Gangs invade my neighborhood
I'm not going to lie, today I felt fear as I walked to the store because I knew that sooner or later I would become one of their victims - it seems like everyone is falling victim to them. I tried to make my move at the same time as a group of people were walking into the store at once, praying that they wouldn't single me out as the one to approach. I kept looking down, trying not to make eye contact with any of them because I knew that if any of them looked into my eyes they would see the fear and that would be the end of me. Sweat beads were forming on my forehead as I got closer to the entrance. I couldn't help but wonder where the police were when you really needed them, but then I remembered - the police are afraid of them too.
Now that I think about it, this is not the only place I've seen this gang, they are everywhere. They seem to have taken over the entire city. It doesn't matter where I go or what time I go - I see them hanging out, waiting for their next victim. I walked faster trying to avoid a confrontation. Just when I thought everything was okay and I've made the trip safely one of the gang members suddenly stepped in front of me. It was a girl. I'm amazed at how young and almost "normal" she looked, but I know that looks could be deceiving. She looked at me with those evil squinty eyes that cut to my very soul. She wasn't very big, but even so she looked pretty tough. I hate to admit this, but as I looked at her I realized that even though she was a girl, she could probably beat me up and there wouldn't be much I could do about it. I could feel my whole body tense up as I stood waiting for whatever was going to come next. Even now I can't forget her eyes, they were the cold eyes of an extortionist. I knew she could sense the fear running through me. She smiled an evil smile knowing that she had won - then she said those dreaded words that made my blood run cold.
"Hey mister, you wanna to buy some girl scout cookies?"
I yelled,"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" and ran into the store as fast as I could.





Bwahahahaha! That's the best description of the Girl Scouts ever! They must be like the Crips & Bloods 'cause we got 'em here too.
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Watch out for those Thin Mints. They'll cut you up and good.
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Great twist at the end. Had to read it a second time because it worked so well.
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I'm so relieved. I forced myself not to skip to the bottom for the punchline. I was getting so anxious, praying for a punchline, and it was so perfect. Great post.
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They got me...twice. The second time, they were family members. Yes, the gangs have invaded my family. (sigh) They are here at work too. Send help.
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THE INVASION OF THE COOKIE PUSHERS! Run, duck, hide, don't go near them!
Welcome back!
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@CK Lunchbox - I wonder if they "jump in" new members
@Badass Geek - especially if they are "razor" thin mints
@Chris - Thanks
@Ann's Rants - thanks, I may try that hummor site again, it's been a month since they told me my blog was not funny
@Jen - I have two young nieces and sometimes I worry that they may end up in this gang - their inflence is strong.
@MaryAnn - it's just a matter of time before we hear of them at work. Thanks it's good to be back where everyone knows my name.
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Ha! I came over from CK Lunchbox and I'm glad I did. Your post made me glad I have boys and won't have to worry about gangs.
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Great overview. Your style of writing is really a joy to read.
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I really like your blog Tony ..I appreciate your effort...Thanks
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