It seems that as I’ve gotten older I’ve put on a little weight – oh come on, everyone does, but not everyone will admit it. I know a couple of older people that have gained weight in the time I’ve known them and they still claim to weigh what they weighed in high school. I’m not like those people – in denial and/or disillusioned. I know I have gained some weight because I feel it and because I have a friend who has told me that my shirts look like they’ve shrunk. As much as I hate to do this, because I hate healthy food,  I’ve decided that I’m going on a diet and I’m going to try and eat better…or eat more healthy. Someone told me that it would help if I kept a diet journal, so as I need as much help as possible I decided that maybe that was a good idea. Here is my diet journal so far:


                                                                    Tony's Diet Journal

- As I sit at the McDonald's eating my breakfast special #1 which consists of a scrambled egg, a slice of ham and cheese on an English muffin, a hash brown, and a small drink, I think to myself that maybe it's time to go on a diet. They say that as you get older it gets harder to lose the weight you put on, and we might as well face it, we are all getting older. With each passing second that slice of cheese cake digs it's fatty claws into your thighs and holds on tighter. Maybe it will take longer and I may have to work harder, but I will lose the extra weight before it's too late. As God is my witness I will be skinny again!

7:30 AM - I'm thinking of the best way to go about this new challenge. I have a Tae-Bo tape, maybe I can start using that to get skinny. The back of the box shows pictures of skinny people who lost all their extra weight and gained all sorts of confidence just by doing eight minutes a day of Tae-Bo. Now, we all have eight minutes a day that we can use for exercise. Eight minutes a day is nothing, that's how long it takes me to finish a breakfast special #1. The only problem I have with using the Tae-Bo tape is that I'll have to take the tape out from under the table and now my table will wobble - I guess it's better for the table to wobble rather than for me to wobble.

8:10 AM - I once read that keeping a diet journal is a good way to help you lose weight because you write down what you eat and what you did throughout the day. It's supposed to help you see what types of food you're putting in your mouth and what type of activities you're actually doing to work that food off. I better not forget to write down that I thought about doing Tae-Bo; that should be about 20 calories burned.

9:00 AM - This diet is a piece of cake. I've seen people who go diets and they get grouchy and mean. I don't know why that happens to some people and not to others. I'm lucky because I can handle this without those feelings. It's been a whole two hours and I don't feel grouchy or mean - if anything, I'm starting to feel just a little bit hungry.

11:00 AM - This morning's breakfast seems to have worn off. I have to use every ounce of will power to keep from raiding the secret chocolate stash. It's an hour until lunch time. I think I can survive until then. This diet stuff is harder than I thought.

11:45 AM - My stomach is telling me that it wants a cheeseburger with an order of french fries and a large drink on the side. I try not to think about it because they say that when you visualize something then it has a good chance of coming true. I can't help it, I think of the cheese hanging down the sides of my burger, crisp golden fries dipped in catsup, and an ice cold soda to wash it all down with. What can be better than that?

12:00 AM - Lunch time, I've been so good with this diet so far. I think I will reward myself and have the cheeseburger, fries and large drink - Hey, I'll just visualize that I'm skinny as I eat.